I started this blog in order to explore my sexual fantasies; to try to understand them. Why do I have the fantasies I do? Are my fantasies only exciting if I think of them as becoming real? This is what I really struggle with because the answer to that one is yes. In order for a fantasy to really turn me on I have to frame it in my mind as a potential reality. I can certainly tell stories that are purely imagination but in order for them to arouse me I have to imagine them as real. I have to feel her against me, imagine touching her, hearing her, smelling her.
I have tendencies that would put me within the polyamory world I suppose; though I have never been one for holding with any system of beliefs. I feel what I feel and cannot convince myself to do otherwise – I suppose I am too honest for my own good. My wife understands to a certain extent but certainly not enough to ever make it a reality; at least as things stand now. She likes to tell stories, roll-play. I suppose I should exploit that more. The fact is that sex with her takes a lot of mental effort on my part so all too often I feel too tired to invent a good story and make it arousing for both of us. That is terribly lazy of me since that could be the very thing that leads to greater things. So, I will work on that.
How do you feel? Do your fantasies have to feel like reality in order to arouse you?
